3:00- I'm in jail. I'm chained to the floor. I'm also a wolf. This puts me in quite the predicament. Do I focus on escaping, or licking places previously left unlicked?
3:01- I picked option two.
3:03- After some serious thought elicited by licking myself, I have concluded that this must be the work of the demon children. Talo and his monsters will pay dearly.
3:05- A demon has offered me freedom at the cost of petty insults. When I am free and human, I will make sure that she suffers for these quips, but not as much.
She rides on my back like I'm Epona. As my back pain grows, so does her future suffering.
3:15- I see that I am a black wolf, and that the monsters locked inside are the same color as I. It seems Nelson Mandela's efforts have yet to reach this place.
3:20- Whoever imprisoned me was at least kind enough to send me to the castle. My journey has been shortened. The princess wears a hood and I cannot clearly see her face. But the nose knows, and my heightened wolf senses detect great beauty. Also cabbage. I can only hope she is not a vegan.
3:25- I have been informed of the current situation. It seems the demon children are involved, but there may also be greater forces at play. Or perhaps this so called King of Twilight is a demon child in disguise?... I must sniff him in person to know for sure.
3:30- Her face is the face unmatched by even the Goddesses three. Its purity fills me with a goodness so potent that I do not even desire to slit the throat of my former lover. I must have her, but dare I say that I, burdened by this beastly guise, am...not good enough for her. No, that's silly. I must hump her leg to show my affection.
3:35- Surely if I was human, the response would have been much more positive. I have been expelled for now, but she has tasked me with an epic quest to save her kingdom. There is hope yet.
3:40- The imp demon can shapeshift. She took the forms of Colin and Lila. It must have been her who took Epona away and imprisoned me. Apparently they are in danger, and she will aid me in their rescue if I become her servant.
3:45- Not once have I heard a plan more foolish. I shall kill them myself when I find them. But now I am back in the village, yet still a wolf. The perfect disguise to kill the demon children undetected. There is much I do not understand, but I will know all once I control the fates of my enemies. It seems this demon may aid me in my crusade.
3:50- Bokoblins control the village. No doubt the work of Talo. His death will be the slowest. The squirrel said that animals can understand each other. My stomach growls. I wonder if it understands the food chain as well.
3:55- Hawk, one I once called an ally, has turned against me. I will demonstrate to all what happens to traitors. I must punish its new master as well. I have pooped on his rug as he has pooped on my pride. Also I stole his shield.
4:00- The acquisition of this sword marks the beginning of my quest for vengeance. It would be foolish to waste such a tool on the royal family. I have looked for the demon children and they are nowhere to be found. Perhaps they know of my escape and have fled. A wise choice, but futile nonetheless. My infallible skills, now combined with my infallible senses, will thwart their evil. My fangs crave demon blood. 